2019. Wow. Just wow. I still can’t believe we are in 2019 already, time is flying ridiculously fast.
10 years ago around this time, I was preparing myself both mentally and physically to bury my last living grandparent. I wasn’t prepared to say goodbye. 10 years ago I was in deep shock and deep pain. 10 years ago, I was also joining university as a freshman in a whole new country, away from everything and everyone I knew. Fast forward 10 years and I have embarked on yet another new journey, to a place unknown to me, away from everything and everyone I know… I clearly have a trend. But this time it wasn’t for school or to escape pain but to take time for myself on vacation, a break from my part of the world in a whole new part of the world (Hello Bali!) – not escaping pain this time, but dealing with both turning a year older and grief in a better, I guess more millennial fashion ha. Let’s recap birthday month shall we?
Making: A lot more deliberate decisions and actually going through with them. S/o to my boys Jamlek and Kenny for somehow being the push that I needed.
Cooking: The only thing I have managed to cook this month is sausages – in plenty haha. I need to do better in the cooking department this 2019.
Drinking: Way too much in coffee in the past week alone! #CaffeineAddict
Reading: Just starting children of blood and bone by Tomi Adeyemi
Looking: For more creative and innovative ways to fund my travel addiction
Playing: With the idea of using a dating app?? Who am I?? Hahaha
Wasting: I’ve noticed that I waste a lot of time thinking instead of doing – I need to be more active with my thoughts.
Enjoying: BALI! And everything it has offered me since I got here, including the peace I desperately needed.
Waiting: To see what 2019 has in store for me… for my family, for my friends. A new year is always filled with all these hopes and dreams, just praying that at least one if not all do come true for all of us.
Liking: How specific we have become in taking care of ourselves mentally. Mental health is so important and I like that it is becoming centre stage in majority of people’s lives. Peace is key.
Wondering: What the next few days in Bali will have in store, I’ve been enjoying it so much, I really don’t want it to end.
Loving: That in as much as 10yrs have gone by, we still think fondly of my grandma as if she’s still here, still in her house watching golden girls reruns (she’d have loved having Netflix), still getting her weekly mani-pedis, sometimes with me, sometimes without me, still hosting high teas to get everyone to come by because she just wanted to be surrounded by family, still looking fabulous just to go to the supermarket and still telling us embarrassing stories of our parents to make us feel better about whatever crazy rules they imposed on us… it doesn’t feel like 10 years. It feels like just the other day and I love that her memory is constantly kept alive amongst us.
Hoping: and praying for this world. Esp Kenya. After the recent terror attack, no one feels safe in the only place we can call home. I’m not sure what needs to happen for the violence and senseless deaths to stop but I am constantly hoping and praying for peace.
Marvelling: At how chill such a commercialized city like Bali is, I expected to see malls everywhere, highrises etc but it’s kept to its chill coastal town vibe, with a few additions from the west here and there but still isn’t reminiscent of a metropolitan city which I like a lot.
Needing: A travel writing job. Putting it out to the universe.
Smelling: Coffee. Currently sitting in the cutest coffee shop, review coming soon!
Wearing: Black jeans, black and white plaid shirt, black tank top and black flats. Today was clearly a day for all black everything.
Following: A lot more home decor accounts on Instagram. I am putting together a vision for my future home and loving all the inspiration and ideas I get from these home decor connoisseurs.
Noticing: The good in people a lot more than usual and I’m appreciative of that.
Knowing: I need to do more to get more. I need to do more to get further ahead. I know I need to do more.
Thinking: About being 30. Wow. I’m 30 now, it’s still kind of insane to me haha but also surreal. I’ve been loving it so far. I’m told it’s a year of giving no shits at all and I’m so glad about that because I’m tired of caring so much haha. I should fully embrace this whole no effs given attitude and see how well that works for me because the alternative has been so draining. I have also been thinking about how fleeting life can be. Live every day like it is your last guys… life comes at you very fast.
Feeling: Not fully at peace but getting there. I like the feeling of zero pressure around me right now.
Bookmarking: Netflix tab on the browser. Catching up on a lot of tv while on holiday.
Opening: My journal. It is time to write out all these feelings I have bottled up inside – also I haven’t journaled in like a month, it is time.
Giggling: At my friend Sam’s life stories – I just met this guy two days ago and he has the most incredible yet hilarious stories and is a perfect example of the saying – live life to the fullest.